Mindset matters

This blog was voice memo’d on my way to work. If there is on thing I’ve learned while writing Whathaveigottoshare, it is that I should either write down my ideas or get started on a new post right away. If I don’t…. a lot of the good stuff gets lost.

Anyway

This morning I realised how much mindset matters. It is crazy to realise how much your day and I dare even say your life is affected by the way you are thinking and what you make out of a situation. For instance: this morning everything just kinda got away from me.

I make it a big deal to get up early. Get out of bed before Kevin is awake so I can get my day started on my own terms. That way I’ve already had my moment of alone time, already done everything that I needed to do for me. To me it feels like this way I can at least try to be the best possible version of myself. When Kevin wakes up 30 to 45 minutes later I am ready to tackle the day. Without being occupied doing my own thing, or frustrated because he is having a moment and I still have to do my makeup and get ready. This way I ensure that I got a moment to myself and I am more comfortable with whatever the day throws at me.

However this morning Kevin woke up waay before my alarm went off, I put him back to sleep. Got up myself and once I was in the bathroom he woke up again. So I decided to take him out, just do it like I would normally do (only 45 minutes earlier). I gave Kevin the chance to have his moment and the attention that he needed at that time. Knowingly that I would have to do my makeup and everything else I had planned WITH him, which is a lot harder.

Little intro story, we have (or had) a bird nesting in the insulation of one of our closets. I heard a little bird fell out of the nest. I recognised the sound because I had already set free a little bird a few days earlier. Guess mom and dad could fly in to reach the nest but the little ones could not get out. I am not the type of person to let a little bird die back there so I knew a rescue mission was in order.

All the while Kevin was still there and just had a major diaper blowout. I had to get him ready to go to daycare because I had some work to do today.

Long story short it was far from ideal and my morning was not off to the best start. But once I dropped Kevin off I realised that, only a few years ago a “start” like this would have been enough to leave me feeling down or frustrated all day. A few years ago there would have been no way (in my mind) to recover from a day starting like this.

I was raised with the idea that not having your house clean, not having the laundry folded away and so on was a bad thing. A messy house, the dishes still in the sink… that was just simply not how one should live. Being taught so has and still does to this day make me doubt myself and feel like a failure whenever I can’t make things work. But I know now that there is a grey area, things can’t and don’t have to be perfect all the time.

The way I’m thinking now and the way my life has changed made me see there IS a way to recover. Yes my day started out shitty and I didn’t get the chance to clean up the kitchen, do another load of laundry and do everything I had been wanting to do. But the bottom line is: My marriage is not going to fail over a few dishes in the sink, Kevin is not going to feel like he is being neglected because I expected him to play on his own and be fine without my entertainment this morning.

All those things, sometimes life just takes over and that is fine!! It is not a bad day, my day can start over now. I am on my way to work, it will all be fine. The dishes will still be in the sink and tonight I get another chance to get everything done. It is all going to be OK, I am going to make it an awesome day.

It’s the mindset that matters!